Wednesday, 21 August 2013 By Mad Mike the Wannabee Marketing Mogul

When some dickhead at Poos Unlimited decided it would be naff to invite the twitterers of the world to ask questions of Rupert's Herald/Sun loony, extreme right wing political shill, constipated, muckraker and bullshit artist extraordinaire Andrew Bolt, the avalanche of hilarity, wit and stupidity that ensued raised a new high for the Twitter platform. It also brought out a clear message that our country is not totally without humour and dominated by brainless, redneck, conservatives of the ultra boring and menace to humanity bent.

Last night as I scrolled through posts in the trend the whimsical smile on my dial slowly transformed into a chuckle, then the giggles came on until my body eventually tightened and my muscular system became overwhelmed by a spasmodic paroxism of laughter induced fits, tears rolling down my cheeks, and the ensuing kidney pain.

Having not tortured myself enough I could not resist to have another glance a few minutes ago and sure enough the laughs are still pouring through.

I share with my marketing colleagues a quick sampler of some of the important questions being asked of the respected Murdoch leftenant that have come through in the last 30 mins:

What are the GPS co-ordinates for Gilligan's Island? #askbolt

Would you rather fight 100 duck sized horses or 1 horse sized duck? #askbolt

A train leaves Brisbane at 6pm averaging 80km/h. Another train leaves Sydney at 7:40pm averaging 70km/h. Why are you a racist dick? #askbolt

Why do dogs lick their balls? #AskBolt

If I have two goats, and I give you one goat, can we eat at yours tonight? #AskBolt

I've had a cold for over a week now. It's slowly improving, but still my nose is blocked. How can I fix this? #AskBolt

Was that someone sneezing, or a dog barking? #AskBolt

How many licks does it take to get to the center of Tony Abbott's arsehole? #AskBolt

How do I change the toner in my photocopier? #AskBolt

#AskBolt - when you & Rupert have sex, which one is the bitch?

Is the hokey pokey what it's all about? #AskBolt

If a tree falls down in the forest, and nobody is around to hear it, do you still write an opinion piece criticising boat people? #AskBolt

Can you recommend a good handyman in Randwick? #AskBolt

Who is the better kisser, Tony Gina or Rupert #AskBolt

Do you think trees mind getting pee'd on or you think they appreciate the extra nitrates and anions? #AskBolt

#askbolt if there was a worm that swallowed another similar size worm whole, would you rather be the inside or outside one and why?

#askbolt Who was your favourite mouseketeer from the Micky Mouse Club

More hilarity and similar items of national importance here:


All smiles!

Mad Mike


(Catch you on the flip side)




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