Xenox me this Doctor!
Forget the rest and get the fucking best!
Boy, have we some great news for you. The stalwart and extremely intelligent boffins at the Xenox Institute have come up with THE VACCINE of all vaccines. One that will have you weak at the knees with that sweet long lasting COVID protection we all crave.
That's right, you have heard it here first. Now you have no excuse for not getting out there for a jab. You are gunna like this shit so much we are sure you will be back for more and more!
So what's so special about the XenoxVac? Well let Professor Williams, head of the World Famous Xenox Institute, explain...
"We took what is best in nature. In fact, I can tell you that this vaccine is derived from purely natural products. Nothing artificial! Only what protects and nurtures you...
What we did was we took that nasty COVID spike protein and put it into the coca plant and opium poppy.
Can you fucking believe it?!?
"Then we ground it up, mixed it all around, and purified it down to the essential components. I tell you this is a concoction that will keep you protected and STONED out of your fucken mind for months!
Gentlemen. We have found the purest mixture of freedom and health. That's right. Good health even."
And what about your Phase 3 trial results Prof?
"What? Fuck that! You think we have got time to waste doing shit like that? Look I know it works. We have tested it on a few animals. Also, me and the lads here in the Lab have been using this shit for months and none of us had got COVID or any side effects. You can take this one to the bank boys."
Thanks Prof! That's all the proof we need.
Xenox Institute Lab Animal.
So there you have it. A jab that will have the Hoi Polloi protected and coming back for more. And no worries about any problems with the looney anti-vaxxers here; they will love this shit.
Forget the Pfizer, Sputnik, or Sinopharm. Get the XenoxVac!
Stick it into your arm today. With it we are gunna inoculate your third eye. With our Vaccine of Freedom we are going to send those chinky viruses packing!