Celebrity Tales

What type of English Royal Family Do we Want?

Created: Thursday, 04 March 2021
Written by Royal Reporter

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Questions have been raised about the Germans in Buckingham Palace...

 Queen Mum on the Piss

Maybe it is time for a rebrand. Let's get them some new PR hacks, and get ourselves a brand fucking new Royal Family.

 

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TEHRAN TETE-A-TIT: THE BIG THREE ‘43

Created: Saturday, 26 November 2005
Written by As featured in film

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October 1943 and The Big 3 meet at Tehran. I was lucky to be there as a junior diplomatic officer for the Australian Government…


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What can Indian PM Modi teach the West?

Created: Friday, 19 September 2014
Written by New Delhi Desk

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He is the new leader of a vibrant and dynamic country that is rapidly climbing up the economic ladder to success.

Experts and scholars agree that Narendra Modi is a unique talent who will change the face of India, and perhaps the world, forever. 

modi drummer

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As one King steps down Queen Liz declares she also has had enough

Created: Wednesday, 04 June 2014
Written by Royal Reporter

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English Queen Liz says “Fuck it, I’m leaving” after hearing that Spain’s King Carlos quits

queen liz

 

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SIX AMAZING THINGS YOU NEVER KNEW ABOUT WINSTON CHURCHILL!

Created: Friday, 21 March 2014
Written by Ex Buzzfeeder
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He is the greatest hero of the Twentieth Century but did you know that Winston Churchill had many secrets that have been kept hidden from public view?

But now, after many years of research and FOI requests, XenoxNews.com can release six amazing things you never knew about Winston Churchill!

winston churchill gunWinston Churchill. Gangster.

 

#1 Did you know that the fate of post-World War Two Europe was decided on a night in Tehran in 1943 where Churchill got pissed with the evil Russian dictator Stalin?

 

 #2 Did you know Churchill was responsible for ANZAC day?

 

#3 Winston Churchill was the worldwide leader of the Freemasons in the early 20th Century.

 

#4 It was not Churchill’s voice when the BBC broadcast his famous wartime speeches. It was in fact the voice of a BBC actor.

 

#5 On holiday during WW2, Winnie loved to roam the beaches of Florida naked!

 

#6 Winston Churchill had the longest cock of any world leader; before or since!

 

Going JIHAD FOR DAD!

Created: Thursday, 22 August 2013
Written by Raspberry Cordial
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Osama Bin Laden may be rusting in Davy Jones locker but he left a lasting legacy in flesh and blood. He had so many wives, and children innumerable. Including countless sons…

 

osama wife 3

One of Osama Bin Laden's wives...

 

How much longer do we have to wait till one of his boys go JIHAD for DAD?!?!?

I have always thought the only advantage of Osama's ill begotten religion was the fact that you could marry more than one woman. For we all know you can fuck an ugly woman at least once, but you can’t fuck a beautiful woman forever…

Christ old Osama sure used this rule a lot - Look how many he had. And look how many boys! They are out there, like a ticking time bomb they are waiting to go off.

Where are they? Why aren’t they tagged?

osama wife 1

Here is another one. Unbelievable - the life that pevert Osama led.

 

We live in a funk of fear of jihadi wannabes; what is being done about this brood of them?

Forget about intercepting some poof’s Brazilian toyboy; why aren’t those clowns in Whitehall and Langley Field on to these guys???

I know I am going to wake up one day to news of a new atrocitry by Osama’s boys. And you can bet it will be the bleating lefties to blame. Inhibiting our security agencies work with their cries of 'civil liberties' and 'civil rights'.

osama wife 2

Even space women couldn't resist Osama's smokey charm and snake like penis.

 

Fuck that! Target the ones we know are gunna go off.

 

And do it now for fucks sake; before we all suffer the consequences.

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